Girl 67- 2

Sam, the undertaker, and his assistant, Fred, stood by the back entrance, smoking Marlboros and admiring the view. ?Another slow day,? remarked Sam, ?...othing scheduled.?Fred responded, ?Well, at least you can give me a chance to win back some of the money I lost in the last card game,? turning towards the door.Just then, a van with hospital plates turned down the side street, and into the rear parking lot. ?Hey,? the driver yelled, ?I got one for you.??Guess I’ll just have to keep the money for. After their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more kids.The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive.'A less costly alternative, ' said the doctor, 'is to go home, get a cherry bomb, (fireworks are legal in Alabama) light it, put it in a beer can(COORS), then hold. " You couldn't keep us from getting married, so you do the nextbest thing - if he's a woman then we can't stay married. Thatright?" Well, yes." admitted Lydia. "By the way, where did he go? We're willing to help him get started in a new life." Well, that's damn generous of you. He, she is in the otherroom. It never crossed your mind that I love him, and don'twant him to get a _new_ life?" Now, Janet, we know what's best for you. You'll find someoneelse, your own kind." My own kind? Carl. He couldn't get over how normal she sounded, and how normal she was in his mind when he thought about her, and how bizarre she looked in comparison to that."What turns you on?" she asked."You mean sexually?"She giggled. "Well duh. What did you think I meant?"He stared at her. "I can't just tell you that kind of stuff." Why not?" Because I'd get all embarrassed. You're a girl!" I'm a woman, big boy," she said, exaggerating the vampish voice she used. "I'm a woman who gets all wiggly when I read.
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